麻辣校园

                       What You Need for Success in Family Life?

Success is what many people, including you have been longing for, and you must have done much to court the Bitch of Goddess as D.H. Lawrence once nicknamed it. To succeed, mere longing and effort is far from enough, the top priority is that you must be clear about what you really need for it.

“Jack, so far, has been a failure, George is far from successful, and you, Bob have tasted your first cup of successful wine.” I came to, if not jumped to, this conclusion yesterday after my table tennis match with Bob.

Jack, though divorced, began one year later to live with his ex-wife, who still treats him almost in the same way about which Jack seems helpless. Since last October, he has been working as a door keeper or a security guard for George, and George, for his elder brother who manages an underground shopping mall. Actually George has tried several kinds of businesses, and now simply relies on his brother.

“Jack’s failed because he used to be too soft with his wife who maltreated him, which led to their divorce, and George’s far from successful because he used to be too hard on his wife, which led to their separation.”

Perhaps, George followed Nietzsche’s male chauvinism: “Are you going to see your woman? Don’t forget your whip with you!” while Jack perhaps put that romantic song into practice: “I want to be a lamb beside you, wishing for you to whip me every day…….”

So with lessons above, what do you need for success in family life?

The following concepts are worth your considering:

Equality---One is never a servant to the other;

Dignity---Both feel respected;

Freedom---Neither wants to dominate the other unless one side is totally willing to;

Confidence---Both should help each other to maintain confidence;

Friendship---Apart from love, both need friendship out of wedlock if not love.

Skill---Neither should neglect the skill with which to appeal to each other.

However, I am still not sure whether it’s a bit late to share these with Jack and George or not, perhaps they are too wise to guide, or too silly to teach.

(July 22, 2008)